Friday, November 18, 2011

Fired - Extended Version - Part 2

An entire TWO WEEKS goes by. I have all but forgotten about the whole situation when I am called back to the back office.

I head back thinking it probably had something to do with the two girls I had been training. 

I walk in and Nancylynn closes the door behind me and tells me to have a seat. There sitting in front of me was the corporate loss prevention guy, Matt.

Matt turns to me and with his head in his hands heaving big sighs, and in a tone of deep disappointment (like I had just committed murder) says,

“Tell me about this candy incident.”


What?? I am looking around thinking, Am I being punked? Where is Ashton?
(all the while my manager, Nancylynn won’t look at me.)

“Well, it was a while ago, let me remember.”

“We know you are guilty, we have the surveillance tape. I just want to know what you were talking about as you sneak around eating the candy.”

Sneak around?
Now I realize sometimes I can do dumb things but somehow I managed to graduate college. And even though I didn’t learn to look for cameras at college, I guess my street cred gave me that experience.
And somehow after working there for 6 months I may have noticed the very obvious cameras that were directed at each register. But I am sure he was right, I was probably sneaking around in the direct line of vision for the cameras to pick it up.

“Well, we were discussing how one of the flavors tasted like chocolate covered cinnamon bears and how much we loved those. So, yeah, mostly we were talking about chocolate covered cinnamon bears.”

“I see. You seem like a good person.”

“Yeah I am a good person.”

“This is a first time offense?”

“Yes sir, I have never even been late to work.”

“You realize that you took something that wasn’t yours, this is just like if you were to take a pair of jeans and run out of the store.”


“This is the same as if I were to go into your purse and take a piece of gum.”

"Ok." You could have a piece of gum, especially if I was going to throw the gum away.

“This would be the same if I were to go into your purse and take a thousand dollars.”

“You are right, I am sorry. It was really dumb and I will never do it again.”

“So I will tell you what’s going to happen now. We do this in a very unbiased way, I do the investigation and then I talk with two other corporate people and we make a decision. I will go make a few calls. I will also need you to sign this document saying you will pay for the item you ate, lets see the price divided by two means you owe $2.66.”

“Can’t I just give you the $2.66? Do I have to sign this document?”

“Well the document says that we hand this part over to an attorney and any additional attorney fees you will have to pay for as well.”

Of course this is already after I signed it.

Matt goes to make his phone calls and leaves me there with my spineless manager Nancylynn who still won't look me in the eyes. At this point I am crying because I am humiliated and I cannot believe that this measly little thing has been escalated into a felony.

Nancylynn, while looking at the floor says,

“It’s like that general conference talk, I don’t remember who gave it: come what may and love it.”

Excuse me?? That, is what you are going to say to me?

Matt comes back and says, “Well I couldn’t get a hold of the other people so we are going to have to put you on assisted leave, which means you have to leave the premises immediately and cannot work until we determine if you will be terminated or not.”

“ok, this actually works out great because I am substitute teaching and I really need to research the lessons.”

Matt looks at Nancylynn like that wasn't the reaction he wanted from me after he delivered such a heavy blow. 
I am thinking, SWEET, I don't have to close for the next few nights like I was scheduled to do.

“And if you talk about this with any one else involved you will be terminated immediately.”

**This whole situation happened about 2 1/2 years ago when I worked for Ross. Not my current predicament with being laid off while on maternity leave from xango.


  1. WTF?! I mean really...I am speechless a this story. Both amazed and laughing at my desk right now. This is one of the best stories I have heard to date. You should have asked them if you could go buy a new package to replace what you ate. I think I would've started laughing in the end. You're a trooper girlfriend.

  2. hahahahah sorry I was sooooooooooo confused. I just read your comment on the other post. Thank you for telling me! And I am so glad you don't think I am a creeper hahahah it makes me feel better you read my blog too hahaha. It was forever ago, and I am glad we are friend too hahaha. But seriously I think your whole family is spectacular! Kinda wish I was a part of it hahahah just kidding!

    Now on to the post... pregnant or not... it is candy people!!! And $2.66 is not the same as $1,000. You are honestly too good of a person because I would have laughed in his face and been like "no that is not the same at all!!! It is quite the stretch actually!!" Did Nancelynn have a grudge against you... because that comment was really passive aggressive! And I don't know what lawyer would fight over $2.66... I think they were trying to scare you because cooperate does not have time for small petty things like that. I worked at Disneyland and small petty things like that would be worked out through HR or maybe just management followed by a small disciplinary act.

    I am sooooooooooooooooooooo sorry that this was even an issue for you! It would make me filled with anxiety and guilt just because of the guilt and pressure they were putting on. So I would be crying too! Will there be a part 3? I need to know what happens next!!! WORST WORK STORY EVER!!!

  3. Oh my gosh! That is pure craziness! Funny, but infuriating at the same time

  4. Ok, this just makes me sick. Is there a part 3?!
    I'm never shopping there again. wow.