Hypnobirthing

I am a bit hesitant to write about this subject mostly because of the reactions I have gotten from people when I have told them about it face to face.
I am going to give natural childbirth (oh really? My sister-in-law did it, although I could never do it.")
I am going to give birth using the hypnobirthing method (What's that? with a "your crazy" look)
I am giving birth in a birth center (What? why? what if something goes wrong?!)

Please know that I think westernized medicine is great. It is truly amazing what they can do nowadays for pain and illnesses. I promise I don't look down on any woman who has an epidural during labor and delivery.


For me, I truly believe that pain during labor and delivery is actually not necessary, and it's quite possible to deliver a baby with no drugs and no pain. (insert every "you're crazy" stare here, and comments on how i have no idea because I have never actually gone through it, followed by graphic horror stories of their own or a friends delivery.)


So let me explain in the simplest way I can:


The uterus is a muscle; actually it is three muscles although with the birth process we use only two of them: the inner and the outer layers. The inside layer actually works all throughout a woman's pregnancy by holding the baby inside, and the outer layer does not come into play until labor. Here is a picture of the three layers of the uterus, sorry it's so small:

Top = outer layer. Middle = middle layer. Bottom = inner layer

*picture from book: Hypnobirthing: the Mongan Method

At the end of pregnancy when the time comes the baby releases the hormones indicating that it is done developing, and the woman's body releases a similar hormone indicating it is ready for the baby to get out. Those hormones together start the body into labor.


How labor is supposed to work: The hormones tell the outside layer of the uterus to start pulling upward in a wave like motion. At the same time those hormones tell the inner layer of the uterus to stop holding tight, so those rings you see release and the muscle relaxes allowing the baby to move down and through the birth canal. If these muscles work how they are supposed to there should actually not be any pain, just a sensation of pressure, or tightening, or perhaps something similar to period cramps.


Sounds easy enough, right? So why does every woman tell about the excruciating pain? I will tell you, it comes down to fear. We have been trained through stories, movies, etc. that childbirth is painful. If we fear something and are faced with it our bodies are incredible things and we are equipped with a process we call fight or flight. Once we enter into this state our brains tell our bodies to start pumping blood to our legs, hands, and senses (because we will either need to fight, flight, or freeze). So our bodies take blood from other parts of our body that don't seem as important at that moment... like the uterus.


When the uterus does not have enough blood the outer muscle of the uterus still surges upwards but the inner muscle does not have enough blood to release and soften so it still holds tight in those rings not allowing it to thin and move upward. This creates a contrasting situation... thus what we call contractions (and pain). Did you know many women who deliver babies in this intense state of fear, Dr's say their uterus is white? It's white because all the blood is being pumped to other parts of the body.


So now that I have explained how it's possible to deliver a baby without pain (or I guess I explained why there is pain) I will explain the hypnobirthing method:


When I tell people I am going to deliver using the hypnobirthing method, the biggest question I get is: "you are going to be hypnotized?" Yes, sort of. But the word hypnotized carries with it a kind of stereotype or connotation of a watch swinging in front of your face ...you are getting very sleepy... then at that point your will is taken away and you will do anything the hypnotizer tell you to do, right? Well.... that's really not the way it works.


In fact it just means you are in a deep state of relaxation and you actually have a heightened awareness with full control over your will and your body. (it is not the imperious curse from Harry Potter) Hypnobirthing helps to teach you how to relax and get to that deep comfortable relaxation. I don't know about you but if someone tells me to "relax!" my body doesn't necessarily respond immediately and slump down in a relaxing way. However in yoga classes when it comes to the relaxation part and the instructor, in a calm soothing voice goes bit by bit through my body "...now picture your shoulders melting into the floor. With each breath every muscle and ligament loosens and relaxes..." that puts me really deep and I feel completely tranquilized.


So guess what hypnobirthing does? It basically teaches Trevor how to be a yoga instructor, well I guess more of a relaxation instructor. Seriously, it's so simple. Once you re-program your views of labor and delivery with positive affirming thoughts, free of any fear, the next part is getting to a deep relaxing state. Trevor and I practice, he will talk to me in a soothing calm voice and tell me to "...relax your jaw, let your tongue release and drop behind your upper teeth..." he encourages me to visualize our baby descending the birth canal in a smooth easy transition; he reminds me that my body was made for this and that our baby and my body are working together for a perfect, normal birth; and on. We are getting to the point that when he starts talking in that gentle way, or he lightly tickles my skin, I go almost instantly to a deep relaxed state.


It has enabled an incredible bond between the three of us, and Trevor doesn't feel like a spectator in the whole process, he is an active participant.


I truly believe that the whole pregnancy and birth can be a spiritual experience; I believe this because i have already had some incredible experiences, I know this little girl. I also know this method works, I have seen it work and because I know it will work for me, it just makes sense. But don't take my word for or against it, do your own research, I promise you won't regret it.


So there you have it, in my very simplified and unsophisticated point-of-view. If you would like to know more please read the book: Hypnobirthing: The Mongan Method by Marie Mongon.

Legit Surprises

Trevor and I have not been very good about surprising each other when it comes to gifts.

I am super ridiculous because I will usually talk through (with him) the gifts I could potentially buy him to figure out if it will fit in our budget. Whereas he is super cute and cannot keep a secret because he just gets so excited!

I am proud to say we BOTH pulled off spectacular gift surprises for our anniversary this year!
I got Trevor a welder, which is something he has wanted really badly but never thought I would get him just because there are a lot of different options to welders that make no sense to me. But I was tricky and called up his buddy, Jordan Taylor, and he was able to help me find exactly what Trevor would want in a welder. I think Trev was more surprised that it wasn't something he would have to take back! (bonus points to me!)

But then Trevor goes and surprises me for the first time!

Since being pregnant I have had some great experiences with retaining water and swollen extremities, therefore I haven't been able to wear my wedding ring since about week 16.

I did not expect it one bit but he got me a replacement band that will actually fit my finger! He said he picked this one out because it had the same pave diamonds that my wedding ring has. (I swear to you he even said the word pave!)

Seriously I have one amazing guy!

It's a Baby Shower!

I had a great baby shower with my friends from high school and they literally showered me with babies!!

It's so fun seeing all these cute girls that I have grown up with have all these little kids that look like them! so weird, aren't we all still 16?

Most of us, but I missed a few of the girls. I need to get better at taking pictures.

The food was scrumptious! Thanks to Whitnie, Jennie, and Ashley for some absolute deliciousness!

Jennie was in charge of the games/crafts so she had us decorate all these cute onsies

With buttons, ribbons, lace and everything girly!

I will need to take a picture of all the cute onsies we decorated, I forgot.

Look at all the awesome things Bridget got! She is going to be one dang cute little girl!

Thank you so much!!

Dear Bridget,

My goodness girlfriend, talk about a mover and a shaker! And I LOVE it! I am pretty sure you have inherited your mama's booty because there is this little spot to the right of my belly button that is constantly sore. Sore like maybe someone is trying to get a little more room in a tight space and is using their bum to make that happen, and it's definitely bum size, not foot size. So did you notice how well we slept last night? That is because you have the best daddy in the whole world and he went and got us a body pillow! He willingly gave us the pillow even though he is now about one quarter turn from falling out of the bed completely. Isn't he the Sweetest? And guess what Bridgey? He is your daddy.
I love you,
Mom

Summer Projects

I am in the process of soul searching, it is very serious business.

I am desperately looking within myself for a hidden talent, a talent that I never knew I needed until now.

Unfortunately not any hidden talent will do, I am waiting to discover my gift for re-upholstering.

You see, I already have a great skill at finding junk for cheap but I was pretty proud of this beauty:

I found it on KSL.com for $10 and every fiber of my being screamed that I needed it!

Alright, alright, I realize I bought a couch that in it's current state is unusable as it is disgusting. So now it sits in my storage unit as I hunt down books and tutorials on how to reupholster a vintage couch. My mom thinks I probably should have started with something a little less demanding in my quest for discovering the "re-upholster talent." But when it's love at the right price, you can't turn back.

soooo...... does anyone know, maybe, how to re-upholster furniture? Or know of any re-upholstering classes being offered in Utah? I mean, of course, I am just asking just to jump start my deeply hidden innate ability.

Our "Thing"

Ever since Trevor and I have been married I have had a desperate desire to figure out what our "thing" should be.

You know, the thing that couples do together, the thing that you only do with that person, and when people ask you say "It's our thing." like that's all the explanation one should ever need. Like it could be: working out together (I wish that was ours), or gardening, or Slurpee Monday's, or making homemade pizza every week while watching re-runs of Fresh Prince. It's something you do mostly because you love to do it together. In fact you would be in trouble if you did it with anyone other than your other, or even by yourself!

For example, Trevor's sister and husband are garage sale-ers, that is their thing. They both love it, and they totally work the circuit. Every Saturday at 8:00AM they are out hitting up garage sales trying to find the best deal or the hidden treasure.

Another example: I had a Young Woman's leader who told me that she and her husband are boaters. When they were first married they could barely afford rent but the first thing they bought was a boat because that's what they both loved to do, especially together, and they have always had a boat.

I had some neighbors who's thing was motorcycle rides. He had a motorcycle but they would go on rides together in the evenings. She once told me she loved that it would give her a quiet moment to just think and close her eyes, she could hold close to her husband but they didn't need to talk.

So now back to Trevor and me, literally for years I have been trying to figure out our thing. We do a lot of stuff together, and there are a lot of things we both love to do, but for some reason nothing seemed to be the thing. Until one day, I realized what it is... we read. That sounds so anti-climactic and super boring, but let me explain:

I love to read and Trevor... not so much. His idea of fun is not curling up with a good book and getting lost in another world. Weird, I know. So, as it happened I would read all these fantastic books and I would want to talk to someone about them or I would bring them up in conversation with him and end up explaining the whole book. So that's when I started reading to him, and surprisingly he loves it! We read at the park, or in the backyard, or in the car (I am a lucky one that doesn't get carsick when I read), or before bed. I get really into books and I laugh and cry, and the best part is Trevor laughs and crys right along with me. Sometimes I make him read but he doesn't really like to, he says "I like the sound of your voice" so with my heart melted I go on reading.

Do you have a thing?

PS it doesn't have to be with a spouse, maybe it's even something you do by yourself, but it's your thing?

Because Everybody's Doing It

I feel the need to comment on... you guessed it, The Bachelorette.

Mostly I came out of watching half of last nights episode with this thought:

Have you ever gone back through your journals and read what you had written, usually about guys, and been completely embarrassed by what you wrote? I wonder how poor Ashley is feeling right about now. No regrets, right Ash?

Very Appropriate

Guess what? This is my 100th blog post!

Are you incredibly proud of me? I feel like I should have a give away or something, because that would be the appropriate thing to do, right?

Instead I will post about how today is my 2nd year Anniversary!!! Which is also very appropriate because he is the whole reason I started this blog. I mean, that's what any good Mormon wife does... write a blog.

Here we are two years ago.

For your pleasure I did some math for you:

- 4 years 8 months = since we met

- 3 years 7 months = since April wanted Trevor to ask her out

- 2 years 8 months 13 days = since out first date

- 2 years 8 months 13 days = since our first kiss (don't read too much into this math. Ok fine, you are right, I am a floozy, I kissed him on our first date!)

- 2 years 8 months 13 days = since Trevor believed we started dating

- 2 years 7 months 18 days = since April believed we started dating

- 2 years 7 months 7 days = since we told each other "I love you"

- 2 years 3 months 23 days = since we got engaged

- 2 years exactly = since we got married!!!!!!

Dear Bridget,

I would like to apologize for making you sit in the car for 5+ hours for 6 of the last 10 days. That was brutal, I know. Mostly because we had such a hard time getting any blood to circulate in our bodies. My feet swelled up to the size of Milwaukee, what about yours?

Guess what, the past couple days I have substituted for an Art History class and I just love it! I am an Art Historian, did you know? So I have been thinking (for some reason ever since you have come along I think a lot more) what will you want to be when you grow up? I hope you know you can be anything. But can I give you some advice? Find your passion, once you do it makes everyday exciting.

I love you little lady!

Love, Mom